a day

2/11/09 3.09am

it's really midnite...din update this blog since for a while

31/10/09-it's a date that i wouldn't be much satisfy in my life, at least this is what i thought for this moment...finally, i went out with H! and..it's a AAR concert day!!!

on 30/10.friday. i received a miss call from H at 2.01pm. i din realise it until at about 4pm. what should i feel at that time? happy?nervous? excited? H called me man!!!!after a while, i start doubting..it's just a miss call..nothing special.it's probably H pressed the wrong number..anyway, I sms H at around 6pm and ask if something important. well, no reply. maybe in sleep. 6.25pm++, i m driving home from work.Adam c from hitz.fm saying that AAR is in the studio with him and this is the last chance to win the ticket from hitz.fm to get to their concert on 31/10. i called. just trying. ya,i have been thinking to go to the concert all the time(i called on29/10 as well but it's not the right time, natalie ask me to say' i want the ticket' for her favour.), thought i hv no chance to see them in one U, god knos it changed the venue and time due to tyson's knee infection. it gives a new hope. anyway, the only thing i wanted to go just cz H introduced AAR to me. and just hoping by winning the ticket, i had at least an excuse to talk to H.everytime i listen to their song, i will think of H. by the way, i called on 31/10 when i heard it's a last chance. just trying, din expect anything. but in my heart, i was still happy that H called me today( although it's just a miss call and it's probably a mistake as well.),i told God, if i got to win the ticket at this last moment, that's mean i got a chance with H to get into relationship, but i know it's possible, cz the winning chance is sooo small, just like the posibilty with me and H.gosh!who knos, adam picked up the phone!man!then, tyson and his gang spoke to me and asked me to do something crazy to win the ticket!my god!!!unbelieveable...first, cant believe that i got to speak to AAR, second, does it mean i got a chance with H since i won the ticket in this tiny posibility? anyway, AAR asked me look for a toilet, climb up to the car, scream:"I am a golden God' again and again with different speed...ya, i won the ticket to the concert and the 'meet and greet' passes. and adam called to my hp for the detail and ask me to collect the tickets at astro on 31/10 between 10am-12pm. sadly, i din manage to record it down as a memory or a proof since i havnt figure out how my HP's voice recorder suppose to function. how sad is that...T.T

i sms H again, said that if free gv me a call and i hv something important...no reply..i got on MSN and i saw H. i msn with H, yes, start with saying' ask u to call but din call'..what so coincident is, H listening to AAR's song at the moment i saw H on MSN...after a long chat..we stopped. did not get a chance to talk about the concert yet...H said nid to shower. (H told me the next day straight away offline cz went to watch CD before shower, it's takes a long time ady=.=) then i tried to sms H asking about concert...too bad, H cant make it cz gotta get to aunty's open hse and do not dare not going cz H's brother get their anut really pissed off when he when to AAR concert but already promise the aunt at the first place.) my hope gone...

then i have to get somebody to go with me. it's hard because i tot local u student was not free or not in KL while they are not and they are the one who have huge interest on AAR! and shit! i have class on 31/10 morning...

and 1 thing funny is, i tot the meet and greet is happening on 11.30 AM.thus i din ask my fren to collect for me. and i called astro early on 31/10 morning and no one know about the thing=.=..finally, i discovered it's actually 11.30PM..before the 'huge discovery', i decided to pick up the ticket and skip my class after a long consideration while actually i can attend my class and ask my friend to collect it. but all theese it's too late due to the late discovery.

anyway, hv to thanks the late discovery as well. i called H on that morning to ask to go astro together with me since h never been there before. but i din expect that H will follow, i called H as a last resort.(i know H will only go aunty house at noon, H told me, so still available in the morning, called for trying) who knos again...H said yes..(probably i promised that can get home by 12.30pm)..but, we went in astro..but tot many people in q( actually they came for my fm recruitment) so we send our sister to work and finally get back to astro...then, H did not said no when i said go n had my breakfast together( H had a little bit-consider a breakfast already) H said din bring much money and ask me to buy H, sure man! for H..everything i can spend without thinking..i brought H to my house a while, gotta change my shirt...my mum saw H..haha..the same expression..when i ask H if H wana get doen from the car...H said:'dunwan, after ur mum scold me again...'of course did not mean that, just said it in funny way..ya...v had breakfast together at mamak after many times 'drive and round' the same area again and again. ya..v chat a lot...n..funniest thing...i let H to drive the car..inside astro area, finish breakfast n drive to somewhere to buy food for my cousin..it's a long journey, at least for H,a person without licence but father taught about driving auto car. we been thru some difficult narrow road and so on..haha...even H's father did not allow H to drive that far...wow...i took a lot of risk..i think H is the first friend that I allow to drive my car...unbelieveable....i cant believe i allow somebody to drive my car..i mean somebody that not having blood realtionship with me(cz if my relative drive and run into accident, i wont be the one who get blamed; if my fren, i will die deadly..) with H..it's just sooo many thing that i can do that usually its imposible for me.

5.30pm 31/10 i hv to get to bukit jalil according to hitz cruises thru the phone. so, i went to the concert with my cousin finally..after a long waiting...wow...AAR performance are so amazing when live...its really different betwwn listening thru radio and live...it's crazy....it was so overwhelming to me..especially when they play 'move along'...if H was there together with me, i think i will probably cry..well, happy tears...oso, 'it ends tonight'....and when the crowd sing together with them in 'it ends tonight' and 'give u hell',esp 'it ends tonight'..wow..it was awesome...cant just describe it thru words...they started with 'move along' and ended with 'give u hell'...yes, cant deny...my mind is all about H besides AAR...thats why i called H before it really start..but it seems that H dun really wana talk with me at that time, H is the one who started to said' okla' after asking me izit syiok over there..whole conversation within 40 mins..haiz...

anyhow, get to meet AAR soooo close after the concert...mayb many ppl won 'meet and greet' as well..so they hv to be fast...i only got to see mike, a little bit of tyson, but not chris and nick cz i couldnt even take my camera out and shake my hand or talk with them..the crews ask us to take photo and that's it..haiz...so, get to meet the real perosn of AAR soooooooooooo close, just in front of you, but cant hv the chance to talk, shake hand or film the whole process....(probably i m standing as second last and since the radio winner only 8 attended, and they want to get all settle sooo fast, i din hv all those chances, but the person in front of me did, at least shake hand and speak to mike..)if i could, i will ask tyson or anyone of them if they still remember that i m the one who called yesterday and they ask me to climb up to the car....haha...

anyway..till today..i m still all H in my mind and so happy all the time..i really duno the reason of being so happy....probably i din see H for long time n din expect to get out with H yesterday...probably for H is nothing..but for me...i duno...its just happy, not for nothing, for reason, n i think the reason is so obvious..

recently found out, i will still miss and in love with the US and German actor sooooooooo much esp German, but it maybe, and high posibility, it will be fading away when if i get along with H...

it's silly me...cz i clearly kno..h ady in relationship and....ya, v r impossible..i jz kno...

i just met H half day, but dunno how many days i can be happy for it...how incredible is the power of love?

between AAR and H, who will i choose? sure H......cz i kno and like them only because of H....

31/10..i will call it a day...a real day for all these moment that i hv been so down for everyday...